The construction work that led to the loft getting a landline earlier this season on New Girl is back to stir up a debate between Schmidt and Jess with regards to getting things done; Schmidt thinks palms need to be greased whereas Jess is all for friendliness and by the book actions. Appearances are not all they seem as Nick and Coach discover when Winston graduates from the police academy and they fret for his safety when they see the small stature of his training officer, Aly. They can’t quite figure out how the guy who paints cat bowls for not only his cat but his roommates – where is Ferguson? – isn’t going to get stabbed by a kid on the job and their attempts to protect their friend are both dumb and very sweet.
The shark versus dolphin approach is reminiscent of the Jess/Nick debate from “Landlord” back in season 1 when Nick argued there is always an ulterior motive for generous acts (on this occasion he was proven right as their landlord thought they were going to have a threeway – this is still one of my favorite episodes). The winner of this debate between Schmidt and Jess is vague in that Jess is successful in getting the night construction switched to the daytime; however she has to use some nefarious tactics for this victory. No palms are greased, nor does she send an envelope filled with fake blood and a note saying “I know” instead she targets one of Schmidt’s weaknesses with his vanity.
Earlier in the episode Schmidt frets about his new tailor and how his cuff lengths on his jacket are not quite right, so when Cece mentions his cuffs seem a little off right before he is meant to argue in favor of nighttime construction it throws him off in the exact way Jess predicted. Jess feels a little dirty for resorting to this manipulative tactic (after some awkward straw mouth missing gloating) but really Schmidt had failed with his attempt to get Councilwoman Fawn Moscato (played brilliantly by Zoe Lister Jones with a character who wouldn’t be out of place in Pawnee) on side. Moscato is the kind of woman who can get Schmidt to do her bidding as she’s a little bit mean and has all the power (much like his relationship with his boss in season 2); she manages to appeal to everything he’s turned on by. Have you ever seen Schmidt look happier or more puppy like than when he stuck his head out of the window after he took hairspray to the face?
Schmidt is even impressed with how Jess effectively used his insecurity against him and it adds validity to his shark argument. The highlight of Jess agitating Schmidt comes much earlier in the episode as she keeps invoking the word “bro” and when everyone else follows suit it becomes even funnier as Schmidt gets more wound up.
Jess does attempt to go through all the correct channels, first by filling in endless forms while Ryan gets bonkers horny on red wine. Followed by performing a speech with visual aids – the visual aid is Ryan dressed as a construction worker and he continues to be impossibly handsome – that lays out the argument in a succinct manner. It’s very Jessica Day. A quick word on Ryan and I am so glad he has become more than just the standard 3 episode arc love interest as he doesn’t feel out of place in this group, plus the aforementioned handsome. He is still pretty perfect and this might be a problem in the future as currently the only conflict comes from the forbidden aspect of their relationship, but at the moment I am really enjoying what Julian Morris is bringing to the show. We do learn that Ryan’s uncle was arrested for having sex with a dolphin and Cece’s reaction to this random piece of Ryan information is pretty much perfect as she is “having a lot of difficulty nailing” him down.
This is a good guest star week and Nasim Pedrad slots in nicely to the New Girl world taking no shit from Nick and Coach as they air their concerns about Winston’s new career. I can understand why they might worry for their friend after watching Winston’s crazy antics for the last few years (although I really need to see Evil Winston – flashbacks please!), but dudes don’t judge how badass a woman is by her stature because she will kick your ass. As is the norm there are a lot of very funny Winston moments this week with his crossword idea being high up there for me; “Who likes cats? Winston across.” There is a whiff of Let’s Be Cops to this plot which was going to happen at some point with this storyline and if that movie had been Nick and Coach trail Winston I would have been much happier.
New Girl Style Watch
This outfit is a twofer as Jess is wearing a super cute Eva Franco summer dress paired with a black blazer from J. Crew which is giving me all the Liz Lemon feelings right now.
TV Ate My Wardrobe 
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